Horse Haikus: Manure Edition

Sorry about the crappy poetry.

Flickr/MookieLuv/Creative Commons License

Back in the olden days of Horse Nation (OK, it was just 2012 but it FEELS like a long time ago), we used to have a series called “Horse Haikus.” Every now and again I’ll get an email from a reader who wants us to bring it back because, you know, it was pretty hilarious.

Earlier this month I received such a request from Victoria Scarffe, a longtime reader who described herself as “on maternity leave and kind of bored.” She entertained herself by writing a series of poop-themed horse haikus and sent them our way. (Sorry, we seem to be on a bit of a poop kick this week.)

From Victoria:

Husband at the barn
Wearing his shiny new shoes
Uh oh! Watch for poop!

Pigeons love the barn
Eating grain, sleeping overhead
Uh oh! Watch for poop!

Horse rolling in dirt
Twisting body and waiving feet
Uh oh! Watch for poop!

Time to trim the tail
Old horse, got into cookies
Uh oh! Watch for poop!

Tee-hee. They reminded me of these from the HN Horse Haiku archives:

Big horse show today
Rolled in some lucky green poop
Why is mom crying?

—Leslie Wylie

Stall rest so boring
Chew on wood play in water
Look! poop in my mane

—Kirsten Collins

There is a certain
Smell when you walk in a barn.
It is manure.

—Liz Fletcher

On a different note, one more for ya…

Send us your haikus
5-7-5, it’s easy
Horse Nation needs you

Seriously, let’s get Horse Haikus up and running again! Email your own horse haiku (a three-line poem with 5-7-5 syllables per line) to [email protected]. Include a photo of your haiku’s equine inspiration if you like!

Go Riding.