WARHorses: Up on the Rooftop, Click Click Click…

That is NOT gonna fit down the chimney.

…And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

I ran out the door and quick turned around

My crazy fool horse on the roof’s what I found.

Any other time of the year, footsteps on the roof would be cause for a desperate call to the local police. But it’s the holidays and we’ve learned from Christmas poems and songs that stomping overhead is just Old Saint Nick. Or is it?

If you ask the Downey Family of New Brunswick, Canada they’ve got a tale. The stomping on top of their barn wasn’t Mr. Claus but one of their intrepid colts who climbed a stairway before making his way on to the roof.

Photo by Archie Downey

A few months later, the Bryant family spotted another shingle shuffler on the roof of this mobile home in Cheyenne, Wyoming.

Photo by James Bryant

And the problem doesn’t just reside in the northern hemisphere, it’s a global issue. This horse from Coyhaique, Patagonia is quite adept scrambling onto this house and for heaven’s sake, EATING IT TOO!

Photo by P. Hartmann

My great grandmother told me stories about their childhood horse’s climbing shenanigans. I didn’t believe her cause, well great grandmother liked to tell stories. She also drank a lot of “medicine” from a teacup. Then a few years ago I found this – photographic evidence! Not one horse but a fully harnessed team standing on a Nebraska home in the 1880s. (sorry I didn’t believe you great grandmother).

Public domain

So what’s going on? It’s okay for a jolly old man to walk across our roof once a year, we are not alarmed by that. But this horses-on-the-roof thing seems to be out of control. Dare I say, epidemic?

What is causing this rash of rafter hoofing? Why do our grass grazing ground dwellers suddenly choose to mingle with the shingles? Do these roof hugging equines suffer some holiday horse hysterics that cause them to seek a loftier perspective? Are these incidents simply the muse of horses genetically engineered by a dollop of reindeer DNA? Or maybe they’re secretly employed by Santa to deftly toss gifts down the chimney when he falls behind schedule? Is truss trotting the horsey equivalent of a flash mob? Is this phenom the genesis for the term “BAY window”?

I don’t have any answers today. But please know that an official WARHorses investigation is under way. And should you spot a horse on your roof during the holidays. Don’t, for heaven’s sake, don’t make eye contact!!!

Melanie Eberhardt is the founder of WARHorses – Women of Age Riding Horses. As lifetime horse lover, Melanie found little content online that spoke to the considerations of “older riders”. She launched WARHorses to fill this void with pertinent, original content with the added objective of developing a global community supported by meaningful information, inspiration and a lot of laughs.

Horse Nation and WARHorses have partnered to create an online discussion space where riders of age can collaborate, share and celebrate at Horse Nation’s Equestrians Anonymous forums. Check out the active discussions and join today to start the conversation!