Equestrian Time Warp: Tack Shop Edition

Time to face the facts: we are terrible at time management.

Flickr/Rose of Academe/CC

Doesn’t it seem like there’s some sort of spell on the clock when you’re with your horse, talking about your horse or doing something for your horse’s benefit? You swear it’s only been a few minutes, but when you check the clock, the entire afternoon has slipped away. We’re exploring this strange phenomenon in a series of Equestrian Time Warps. First up: the tack shop.

1:28 PM: Ooh, Significant Other/Family Member/Friend, do you mind if we swing past the tack shop real quick? I just need to pick up some MSM and a new pair of bell boots; Prancer lost his in the paddock again.

1:35 PM: Oh, you want to wait in the parking lot? Yeah, that’s fine, I’ll just be a minute — I know exactly where everything is in there. I’ll be back in this car by 1:45. Yes, I promise.

1:36 PM: Spring clearance blanket sale?? Can’t hurt to take a peek!

1:42 PM: 40% off ALL the Weatherbeeta turnouts? AND they have Prancer’s color. Yes please!

1:46 PM: Ooh, does he need the hood? I think he looked chilly this winter. Definitely he needs the hood.

1:47 PM: Or, wait, is his pasture buddy going to just rip it off …

1:48 PM: Well, they’re on sale, so I’ll get two.

1:51 PM: Hey Tack Shop Owner with whom I am on a first-name basis! Is it okay if I just start a pile here by the register?

1:52 PM: Aw, thank you for asking! Prancer is doing GREAT, I think this is really going to be our season. He’s really nailing his changes like a superstar and he’s loving the new grain I switched him over on, he feels great and it really brings out the shine in his coat and …

1:58 PM: *ignores text message alert*

1:59 PM: Tack Shop Owner, of course I want to see the new Devoucoux. Like you had to ask!

2:00 PM: OMG can I sit in it?

2:03 PM: Can you repeat that figure?

2:04 PM: *climbs off of saddle*

2:06 PM: Oh, I got a text message. “Are you alive in there?” Obviously! I’ll send back a smiley face … and the horse emoji.

2:07 PM: OK, I guess I should probably get what I came in here for. MSM! To the supplement aisle!

2:09 PM: Ooh, Devil’s Claw … sounds fancy!

2:10 PM: I wonder if I should add a multivitamin to Prancer’s SmartPaks. This one looks interesting …

2:11 PM: Oh, maybe we should go herbal. All natural, right?

2:12 PM: I never thought about probiotics before. Make a mental note to research those later. Prancer deserves it.

2:13 PM: Who’s calling me? Oh, it’s Significant Other/Family Member/Friend …

2:14 PM: Sorry, I got to chatting with Tack Shop Owner! I’m finishing up, I swear.

2:16 PM: Man, they’re impatient today. Sheesh. Okay, let me just grab the MSM and then I’ll head to the register.

2:18 PM: Ooh, but I just need to stick my head into the consignment room real quick. I can’t pass up a good deal! Significant Other/Family Member/Friend wouldn’t want me to lose out.

2:20 PM: Oh wow, what were the chances of finding this shaped girth in exactly the right length? This is coming home with me.

2:22 PM: As is this schooling bridle. You can never have too many right?

2:24 PM: Look at these field boots! They’re like BARELY broken in but they are totally my size. I gotta try these on. Let me go ask Tack Shop Owner if I can borrow some breeches and socks real fast since I stupidly wore jeans today.

2:26 PM: She’s the best. Okay, off to the apparel section to grab some breeches!

2:28 PM: Oh em gee. Every single thing that Horseware makes is absolutely the cutest. I’ve got to browse these polo shirts …

2:30 PM: I can’t say no to this. I think I even have a matching saddle pad. Perfection! Gonna go throw this on my pile at the register.

2:32 PM: Oh right, breeches. Back to the apparel section.

2:34 PM: These breeches with the Baker plaid accents are too good. I might as well at least try them on if I’m already trying those boots, right?

2:35 PM: And obviously I need Baker print boot socks to complete the outfit.

2:36 PM: No, wait a minute, self … you’re not here to buy breeches and socks. Just to try on those boots!

2:37 PM: Okay, self, but let’s justify this: the boots are on consignment, and the blankets are on sale. I deserve these.

2:38 PM: I’m so right. Let’s go try this stuff on!

2:40 PM: Sheesh, for a tack shop, you’d think there’d be a bigger changing area. Breeches are HARD to get on, people.

2:44 PM: Yep, I’m getting all of this. I look FAB.

2:50 PM: Ooh. Prancer needs a Baker-print saddle pad now.

2:52 PM: Ugh, so many cute saddle pads here. Buy two, get one 50% off? Call me the Sales Wizard, because I am so doing this right.

2:55 PM: Oh, hey Significant Other/Family Member/Friend! I’m so sorry, was I taking too long? Good thing you’re here, you can help me carry all of this to the front.

2:57 PM: What do you mean, “this isn’t what I came in here for?” I am a bargain shopper. And when there are sales, you have to take advantage. Yes, you can go back to the car. I’m just going to check out and I’ll be right there.

2:59 PM: There. That wasn’t too bad. I just won’t get any of those new clothes for work that I didn’t really need anyway. And the mechanic at the shop said there was still SOME tread left on my tires, so I can put that off for another few weeks. Again.

3:02 PM: Yes, Significant Other/Family Member/Friend, I’m all done. Thanks for letting us swing by!

3:04 PM: Hey, is it okay if we stop by the barn? I want to try this new bridle on Prancer.

3:05 PM: It was JUST a question.

3:07 PM: Oh no! I forgot Prancer’s new bell boots! We’ve gotta go back.

Go riding.