Best of Craigslist: ‘Horse parents seek horse baby to complete horse family (Portland)’

From reader Katie B., who writes, “A saying in Portland is ‘KEEP PORTLAND WEIRD’… This certainly applies!”

Horse parents seek horse baby to complete horse family (Portland)

Horse father and horse mother seek horse baby to complete horse family.

We are a loving and dedicated horse couple who can provide a stable living environment. Our stable was constructed by the famous General Whitey Löngface and six compassionate, sturdy Norse women: Hilde Löngface, Gerte Löngface, Haggar Löngface, Cleasby Löngface, Anges Löngface, and Darcy Sheepston.

We have been discussing possibly adopting a horse baby since we discovered that my wife’s horse womb is, sadly, totally barren. Six months (or two horse years) later, we are ready to saddle the responsibility.

We would prefer a foal of decent pedigree, Clydesdales move to the front of the line.

Our interests include horseshoes (we just call them shoes), playing humanshoes (throwing human shoes at metal poles), dressage, alfalfa, and being milked.

We’ve been fooled by ponies in the past so no horsing around.

Serious inquires only. Email for pictures and more information.

———-

This one is also out of Portland. Gemaine S. writes, “Here’s a horse trailer that needs a little more than just the floor replaced as stated in the ad.”

Two-axle Horse Traier – $450 (Molalla)

Two-axle horse trailer, needs new floor, no title. $450

———-

Here’s another perplexing one from Danielle E., who writes, “Part Belgium and part Persian? I hope they had her declawed.”

Horse and Carriage – $4500 (Mammoth Cave, Ky)

For Sale- horse and carriage. Horse is part Belgium and part Persian. She is approx. 6 years old. The carriage has seating for 4 plus separate seating for driver and passenger.

———-

Here’s one from Jenny L., who notes, “This ad becomes almost unintelligible halfway through!”

3 year old Red Roan Appaloosa Mare (Sebring Fl )

I am selling my horse. She is three years old and has a great conformation and personality. She is very smart and gas good ground pen and space manners. I gas a saddle in her until I got into an accident so at this point I can only get a saddle pad on her. She’s a very trusting type of horse. I love her to seat I just cannot keep her. She stands okay for a farrier that isn’t find of anyone really touching her back legs or ears ( cryer enter working in that) she’s an easy keeper and I do have her coggins. I am asking $475 OBO by this weekend ( she’s worth easily more than that) to a good home only. Or I will take trades. She is not registered.

I am looking for seliniuns, go lights, Nito mud grapplers, truck items such as HIDS, LEDS, train horns or MUD TOY. Possibly an ATV does not have to be perfect…. OR…? Text me what you may have

Wow. Readers, if you run across an “interesting” ad in your Internet wanderings, send it our way! Email the link to [email protected]. Who knows–maybe you’ll help connect a horse with a safe, loving home. Go Riding.